And Finally Back Up

It's been a while. I've been pretty busy with school, coaching, and life and have let my blog fall a bit to the side.

But I'm back.

And I'm back to talk about the post I made two months ago, about getting back up. I'm happy to say that I did it. I got back up. Even more important, I think it was worth it.

So let's backtrack. Two months ago I posted the beginning of my novel on two critique forums. At one place, it was really praised. At the second...well torn to shreds would be a good way to put it.

Saying it was a huge blow to my ego would be an understatement. I do believe there were some tears. And some second guessing about my choice to be a writer.

On Getting Back Up

When I first moved to Kuwait, 6 years ago, I started coaching soccer. In one season, I coached two different teams. Both of those teams went on to the finals. Both lost, but just barely. In one year, I'd established a reputation.

Not only with the other coaches, but with myself. After that first season, I expected to always be successful.

And then year two came around. I went to my first game of the season for my U-14 team. We were playing a weaker team, one we'd easily beaten the year before. I even sat some of my stronger players because I thought it wouldn't be a problem.

It was a problem. We got our butts kicked. Badly.

My Dream Classroom

Starting off with a reminder: I'm a writing teacher at a school in the Middle East. I teach writing full time, to about 200 students. (But only 20 at a time).

There's been some changes at my school recently. I could bore you with all the set up of what our (K-12) school is like, but I don't want to be boring :)

Some of our classrooms are becoming empty for next year-actually, almost a whole floor is emptying out. And I've been offered the chance to move into a new classroom. My current classroom is nice. I like it, but it is small.  Actually, it's too small to have my grade 7s in it because they take up too much space.

So I was offered a new room.

Not just any new room. The best room. I'm pretty sure it's the biggest room in the entire school. It has a Smart Board, a projector, and basically enough space for me to put all my students in one area, and still have another area to do something else with (I have no idea what though!)

I've also been told to order anything I want for the room.

I get to plan my dream classroom.

And that's where my problem starts.

Query Writing

For those who don't know, a query is something writer's write (duh) to try to get an agent or a publisher interested in reading their books and taking them on as clients.

Basically,  it's supposed to be this tantalizing hook into what your book is about and make the agent/publisher say, "Gimme More!" Then, hopefully, they'll request pages and you'll be on your way to being rich and famous (or something like that).

Right now, I'm trying to write my first query.

My last entry? Not a lie. Queries are hard.

You're supposed to take your book and be able to entice someone to read more of it in about 250 words.

Doesn't sound so hard, does it? 250 words, we can write that in 10 minutes. So you try. And then you realize it's really hard to take your 50,000 word novel and pull out the really exciting, really intriguing parts and put them into 250 words.

And you decide screw it. I'm not doing this.

Except you have to. If you want to go the commercial publishing route (which I do).

Surprise Lesson of the Day.

Something I learned today.

Queries are HARD.

That is all. For now. More tomorrow....or soon, when I'm done being frustrated.

Vacation Writing Rocks...Mostly.

The last time I was on vacation (in the beautiful Bahamas...a place I basically had to be dragged out of) I managed to finish the first draft of my Middle Grade novel.

I was excited. It was the second book I'd ever finished writing and the first book I ever finished and went "Wow, this could actually be a published novel." (Unfortunately my first novel did not give me the same feeling. It is now trunked while I consider a rewrite).

The good news is, I'm on vacation again! (Doesn't being a teacher rock?) It's winter vacation and I have absolutely no plans. For the first time, I'm not traveling or going home (sorry, Mom). It gave me plenty of time to work on the second draft of my novel.

And I'm done! Yay! But I learned something from doing all this revising.

Revising is hard.

No wonder my students always refuse to do it.

Day One!

Happy NaNo!

It's November 1st, which means fingers are now busy around the world.


This is what my classroom door looked like as of this morning:

It's NaNo Time!

6 days, 13 hours, 22 minutes
OR
157 Hours
OR
9442 minutes
OR
566,520 seconds

My time is ticking away! 

That's how far away we are from the start of NaNo (Kuwait time).  In exactly that time (which I can feel ticking away as I type this) I will be joining thousands of other writers as we race the clock to reach 50,000 words before the month is over.

Nothing But the Truth

Today's post is inspired by the truth!

I've taken the plunge.

I have (finally) started to admit to (real life) people that I write.  For the past two years I hid this away like it was my dirty, little secret.  Just tucked away in the back of my closet, so no one would discover the truth.

This way, no one would ever notice if I failed.  I went to big extremes to hide this from people.  I didn't even tell my husband for the first year.  You know who I did tell?  My students.  It's whats great about kids, they never judge.  And most the time they won't even remember that big, dark secret you told them.

The truth is, I was afraid. Of the same things most A type personalities are afraid of...of failing.  Or, even worse, failing and having the whole world realize it.

So why did this fear apply to my writing?

Knowing the Process

Today we had PD.  PD is a day for teachers to be students and learn a little more about how to be teachers.  We do this 2-3 times a year.

I chose to go to a workshop that was about organization and avoiding procrastination.  I could use the avoiding procrastination help :)  We were also told to bring a major project, which was the main reason I went.  I was hoping for some book writing time.

I didn't get it, but I did get a bit of a funny story.

Part of the workshop was about setting goals.  So he put up a sentence starter "If time were not an issue, I would..."

He looks for answers and eventually asks "Who would write a book?"

I raise my hand (sidenote, before this year, I probably never would have admitted I was a writer--I was too afraid I'd fail).

So he starts asking questions.  And I think, from the start, that he expected this conversation to go a very different way.

Happy Weekend!

It's the weekend!  At least it is over here, in Kuwait. (We have a Friday/Saturday weekend).

And here are some of my favourite things from the past week.  All involve my students and no students were harmed in the making of these quotes--but sometimes just barely ;)


From a student's assignment:

I ran fast like there were monkeys shooting at me.

A conversation with a student:
On a Thursday: 
Student: Miss, your story about the witch.  Is it finished yet?
Me: Yes, but I'm revising.
Student: Ok, but let me read it when it's done.

On a Sunday
Student: Miss, are you done revising yet?  Can I read your story?
Me: Nope, still working on it.
Student: What?  How long does it take?
Me: Months.
Student: But I couldn't even wait a weekend!


Brainstorming with a Student

Student: Miss, I can't come up with something to write about.
Me: Well, you could try some realistic fiction.  Like what if the school burned down or...
Student: Yes!  Furiously types away.

And talking about a kid's story

Student: Miss, I have a character named Kelly in my story.
Me: Really?
Student: Yup, and she's poor. (and then she stuck her tongue out at me).


I love my job.

I Think I've Been Here Before

Woot!

I've finished the first draft of my second novel.  I'm really happy about it, but it's not quite that same level of excitement that I had the first time around.

I think the difference is this time, I knew I could do it.  It's like the first time I raced 5 km.  I didn't know I could do it before.  I thought I might just pass out before the finish line.  But I made it to the finish line before I passed out.  And then there was this high that just followed me around the rest of the day. (I was a bit hyper...and probably annoying to the rest of my cross country team).

The next time I did it, I was still excited to finish, but not as excited as the first time.  You really never get that first time feeling back.

I'm really not surprised that the feeling was different this time.  At the same time, I'm actually a little bit proud of myself.  An author whose blog I followed once wrote about how important it is to finish that first novel.  How you can learn so much from it.

Well, he was right.

Even without trying, I learned a lot.  I learned not to freak out about word count (I freaked out about word count in my novel--I ended up with this totally random detour that has nothing to do with my novel.  It's just to make me have to revise and edit more). I learned about routine, filtering (which is bad!), and not getting caught up in scenes.

I learned a lot.  So this book has a lot more potential than my last one.  I really can't wait to see where it ends up when I finally get to revise and edit the hell out of it.

What did your first book teach you?

On Being Ninjaed

I thought I should follow up on my WriteOn Con experience, now that it's been about a week since I participated.

Overall, I give the experience a solid B+

It was a lot of fun to hang out with a different group of writers for a little bit.  Not that I'd ever be looking to replace AW.

There were a lot of interesting things going on at the con, a few WTF things, and a few things that weren't really new information--but the theme was back to basics and it really did do that.  I liked interacting with people.

And I liked that I built up the guts to finally share my work with the public.  Here's the thing (or at least the thing for me), until you share, it's easy to live in a fantasy bubble.  It's easy to pretend that you could be writer, even though you have no idea if people will like your writing.  Obviously, I like my writing.  I think it's good enough--or will be good enough someday.  But sharing that first piece of work can really burst your bubble.  Especially when you share over the internet.  It's so easy to be critical when it's not face to face.

It took a little bit of encouragement.  A little bit of trying to get people to tell me it was a bad idea.  And then I shared.

And then the comments started coming.  Most were good (yea).  A few offered some good suggestions (even more yea). Most said they would keep reading even though there were flaws (triple yeas).

And then it happened.

A ninja found my story and thought it was worth the time to comment.

I can't really share my first reaction to noticing a ninja had posted on my thread (I can't share inappropriate words here, just in case), but there was a little bit of sweating.  Then I was braver than I'd ever been and I clicked the thread to read what they said.

I was prepared for the worst.  My (first draft!) writing wouldn't be very good. I was wasting my time, I should find a new night job.  I built it up a lot in my head.

But it wasn't bad.  It also wasn't good.  It was rather neutral.  He explained some things that didn't work (which all made sense to me), but the best thing about the whole experience?

He said he would have read on.

That was worth more than anything else I heard that weekend.  An agent would think my writing was worth reading more of.

So I came out of the experience feeling better about my life as a writer.  I can do this.  I'm not about to give up on it.

It was the best thing that happened to me all conference.  Even though his post started with some negatives, it helped me realize that I am a writer.

How did I figure all this out?  By showing a little bravery.

Being Brave

Some of you already know this week the WriteonCon is going on.  For those of you who don't know what that is (Mom), it's an online writing convention.  There will be some agents, some organizers, and a whole bunch of writer's looking for their break into publishing. And some other writers hoping to learn so they can improve their craft.

I'm in that second group of writers.  I want to learn more about craft and hopefully next year, I'll be ready to post a query and hope for an agent to ninja me.  (The agents wander around the forums with ninja names, posting on anything that interests them).

The most awesome part?  It's free.

I signed up for the forums and critiqued for the first couple of days.  And then I started to think.  I could post my first 250 words up there.  Other people were posting things from stories that weren't finished, things that weren't ready to be queried.

So I considered.  And then I sent my 250 words to my mom and my best friend.  Hoping they'd tell me, no it's terrible, don't do it. They didn't.  They told me to do it.

I had to suck up some courage and be brave.  It's hard putting your work out there.  I mean, I've posted work before.  I used to write fanfiction--which can still be found online--and some original work.  But they're all from before I was serious.  Back when I thought I knew what being a writer meant (sitting around and browsing the internet until inspiration hit you).

I read some reviews.  Are people going to tear my work apart? Am I really far away from publishing?  At the end, I realized I was afraid.  I was letting fear hold me back.  Fear that someone was going to burst my bubble and tell me that I couldn't be a writer.  That I didn't have the talent.

But I can't live like that.  You can't be a writer if you're afraid to share; if you're afraid of some rejection.  So I sucked it up, put on my big girl pants, and posted.

Nothing terrible has happened.  Of course, I've only gotten two reviews, but I think that sort of points to what I was already thinking.  That I'm an OK writer.  There's nothing terribly wrong with what I do, but I might need more experience and practice to really get there.

If you're interested, here's the link to my story Magic Wanted.  Feel free to read it and tell me what you think :)  Or don't.  I've discovered I'm OK either way :)

The Coffee Shop Writer

Earlier this week I had a great idea. My husband (that still seems weird to say) needed the hotel room for an interview.  I needed to find some time to write, so I decided to wander around and find a coffee shop to write in.

I mean, if that's how JK Rowling did it, it must be a great idea, right?

So, at about 8:45 am I trekked out of the hotel and wandered around Toronto looking for a coffee shop.  It didn't take long, it is Toronto.  There were about 3 within 500 m of the hotel (2 were Starbucks--I guess in case you didn't want to cross the road). I settled into the one that had comfy chairs.

I don't know about everyone else, but I can't just go into a coffee shop and sit there without buying something.  I don't go to coffee shops often (I don't like coffee), but these places are pricey!  I bought my ($5!) drink and took a seat, popped open my laptop, and got ready to get to work.

The one (and only) thing that seemed to work for me at this particular coffee shop was that there was no wi-fi.  So at least there wasn't that distraction.

But what I didn't expect was how noisy it would be.  I mean, I expected people (and looking back, I should have remembered it was rush hour and would be busy), but I didn't expect as much noise as there was (probably caused by the amount of people).

And of course, I didn't bring my headphones so I got to listen to the sound of the bell ringing every time the door opened (it happened a lot!) and of course there was the blender sound (which also happened a lot!) and there was the conversations going on.  My favourite was the interview I got to listen to.  I don't know what the interviewee thinks, but I have my doubts that he got the job.

To sum it up, there was a lot of noise.  But I was a little proud of myself. I did manage to focus past all of it (I credit that with the lack of internet) and did get almost 2000 words done--which is a good day for me.  I actually only gave up because I really had to go to the bathroom and didn't want to pack and unpack my stuff again.

Anyway, lesson learned. Coffee shop writing may not be for me.  Or, maybe I just need to bring some headphones. Or not go during rush hour.  Or go to a bigger coffee shop (I've been in the one Rowling wrote at...it was a lot bigger!)

So maybe there is no lesson learned.  Maybe I need to try it out in a few different ways. There is something to be said for a change of scenery to help with your writing.

Thoughts?  Do you write in coffee shop?  Or are there other (better) places that help you focus?

Vacation Writing Rocks

Today is my first full day back in reality.  And reality is harsh.  Especially after you've been in the Bahamas.

Not only was the water beautiful, it wasn't too cold either! (And yes that's me!)

I spent the last week in the Bahamas and enjoyed every, single minute of it.  It was a fantastic vacation, only made better because it was my honeymoon and I was with my new husband.

And what an amazing husband he is!

He took charge of the honeymoon and he planned such an awesome vacation.  I'd actually agree with anyone who called me spoiled right about now.  I absolutely was spoiled. We even had butler service so I never had to get up and do something if I didn't want to (which included having lunch brought to me poolside).

But besides playing in the water, eating tons of food, and relaxing, I also did some of the best writing I think I ever did.

For a while before going on vacation, I debated whether or not I should do any writing.  Was it fair to my husband to bring work? I contemplated and asked his opinion.  We both agreed it wouldn't hurt to bring it.  So glad I did!

It actually worked out perfectly for us.  I'd get up early and go reserve us a cabana while he woke up and got dressed. Usually, I'd get about an hour of time to myself. And we'd get an awesome cabana that other people always wanted.

Those hours really added up to being some of my best writing.  It was so relaxing.  There was hardly anyone around, soft music played in the background, and the weather was gorgeous (even if it did melt my Macbook case, just a little bit).

I managed to get in at least 1000 words a day, and it felt so effortless.  It was way easier than when I write at home. I'm pretty sure that if I was on vacation everyday writing would go so much faster.  If only, right?

But, writing on vacation isn't for everyone.  It worked out well for me because of our schedules and because I'm pretty good at stopping before I get too carried away. It also helps that our big plans for the vacation were to sit at the beach and relax, so I really wasn't interrupting anything.

And now we're back in reality and I have to dig out another routine. I have a feeling it might involve some procrastination...but maybe I can push some of it off :)

Just for fun, one of the guys we met on our vacation :) (not that I'm procrastinating or anything)

My friend Igor.

Wait, what?

Tomorrow, I'm getting married.

Still trying to let those words sink in.  It hasn't really happened yet because right now I'm just stress, stress, stress, stress, stress.

There's a lot to do.  So much more than I expected.  Last night we had a craft party to get my centerpieces done.  It was worth dragging my friends and my mom's friends to my house to get them going.  There's still a little bit more to do, but they're close to being done now :)

I still have to do the place cards and go make myself beautiful, but everything should be starting to get much easier.  Well, I hope...seeing as the wedding is tomorrow.

Unfortunately, in all the fuss my writing has suffered.  I've maybe written 1000 words over the last two weeks. I just don't have the time.  And I know the whole adage, if it's important, you'd make time.  I no longer really believe that's true.  It is important, but there's not always time.  Sometimes, you just have to live and put your writing to the side.

I hope everyone is having a lovely week.  At this time tomorrow...well, I hope to be sleeping, but we have to get those darn place cards done first :)

Enjoy your weekend!

I'm in the airport Waiting for my flight to Miami! Woot! Of course, we've been delayed. Boo. But I have used my time to get some writing done. It went well again today, even though I wasn't on my laptop. Why no laptop? I don't like to travel with my laptop. I'm always afraid something will happen. But I wanted to be able to write. So I figured it all out. My fiancé has bothered me and bothered me to use Dropbox. I downloaded it a few months ago. It's something I have, but haven't always made use of. But I decided to upload my most recent draft into Dropbox. Now I'm really glad I did because ive been using my fiance's laptop to write. It meant I had my story available to me easily without worrying about where I was or what else I had planned. I definitely recommend Dropbox. It's one of those tech things that just makes writing so. iChat easier. What tech makes writing easier for you?

Summer Vacation

What I love about being a teacher is (besides my students--usually) is having summers to myself.  It's a great chance to explore other things that I want to do.

During the summer, I workout more, travel more, and spend more time on the internet.  This year though, I've decided to try to do more writing.  Every other summer it's been hard for me to stick with my writing routine.  In fact, last summer I didn't write at all.  That was a mistake.  It took a very long time to get back to writing after that.

For some reason, this summer is different.  I've been more focused and driven to get more done.  I wish I could pinpoint why.  I think it has to do with finishing my first novel.  It's giving me a confidence that I didn't really think I'd ever have.  Now, I feel like a writer.

My new story is also going so well. (Knock on wood).  It feels different.  In my first novel, my characters meandered and wandered and I decided to throw this in and that in.  But with my new one, everything clicks.  Every scene has a purpose and I can tell you exactly what that is.  It makes me feel like I'm closer to being published--even if this might not be the one that gets published.  (I really, really, really hope it does though).  But I'm getting there.  I can feel it.

So this summer, my goal is to write at least 10,000 words a week.  My goal is to do 2,000 words a day and take the weekends off.  Sometimes I get so involved and try to push for too much that I burn out.  I think this is a much more manageable goal that I'm pretty confident I can accomplish every week...maybe except for the week I'm on my honeymoon (just a little over two weeks to go!)

That's it for me.  Shoot me a comment about how writing affects your summers.  Is it easy to stick to your routines?

Small Space, Big Memory

Whenever I come back to Canada, my old room waits for me.  It's not the room I grew up in, since my family moved around a few times, but it's the room where I spent my last year and half of high school, and all of university.

It's also the place most of my stuff ended up.

I think to really get a picture of what this is like, I need to describe my room.  My room is tiny.  Right now, I'm currently sitting on the floor next to my bed.  My feet are almost touching the other wall.  This is the furthest point from me.

In other words, my room is the size of some walk in closets.

But it's my room and my mom (being ever creative) found a way to make it work.  It involved a custom made bed (that I juuuuuusssst fit on) with drawers underneath, shelves above and extra shelving in the closet.

Today I decided it was time to clean out all my stuff (seeing as my suitcase is parked in the living room because there's no room for my stuff).  And I have a lot of stuff.  And even more memories.

I've come across a ton of stuff that I'd forgotten I'd had and I wanted to write about some of them.

Some of the things I've found include my Irish dancing shoes from that time I took Irish dancing for just a few months, my large collection of Disney VHS tapes, pictures of anime characters--from when I was obsessed with all things animes, friendship necklaces (that are only half a necklace and I can't even remember who has the other half), I've got soccer equipment, track equipment, things from Egypt and there is so much more.

But the best thing I discovered while I was digging through my bedroom was something I must have done when I was in grade 3.

And I'll need to back up to explain that a bit.

When I was in grade 3, my sister, who has Spina Bifida, was in the hospital for basically the whole year.  I don't really remember why, but it was obviously related to having Spina Bifida.  Well apparently, while that was going on I got a bunch of my friends to draw her pictures and sent her a whole folder of stuff.  It included a letter which went exactly like this:

To nicole from Kelly-Anne (this was when I was obsessed with using my whole first name)

I hope you get well soon
I miss you relly much (apparently I didn't miss her relly much)
roses are red
villtits are Blue
sugar is sweet
so are you.
I hope you come home soon. When they's noting to do I thank of you and wonder how you are.  I hope I see you soon. Love Kelly-Anne

I can't believe I still have this, I don't even know how it showed up in my room.  But it's nice to be able to look back.

I also found my journals from when I was in grade one.  I can barely decipher the things I wrote.  Maybe I'll share them some other time.  But I have to give credit to those primary teachers, who can somehow decipher even the worst kid's writing. 


Question for you guys: ever come across something about yourself that just made you go awwww?